Wordless Wednesday/Wednesday's Walk

May 5, 2006

I remember this day as if it were yesterday, I actually remember the few days prior too but that is for another time.

I was 36 weeks to the day pregnant, only 4 more weeks until my due date...I still had plenty of time to pack my bags and get things ready, right? WRONG!

At approximately 1:30 am, I woke up with the feeling like I have to pee (nothing knew when pregnant). I got up and walked across the hall and into the bathroom. After I thought I was done peeing, some more "fluid" came out, okay so maybe I wasn't finished I was saying to myself. Honestly I knew something wasn't right, but I still had 4 weeks so I went back to into the bedroom. I woke up LOSER Sleeping Beauty, yup that is what we will call him, and said I think my water just broke. Sleeping Beauty mumbled to me, you are fine just go back to bed. I didn't feel "fine", so I got up to go back to the bathroom and then all I could hear feel was a WOOSH huge damn breaking down my leg. I grabbed a towel and sat back down so I could call the doctors office and see what to do. They told me to sit tight and the dr would call me back in less than 30 minutes....so when 45 minutes passed I called back to hear they would be calling me back soon. I was a mess, I didn't know what to do. I hadn't packed a bag. I just wasn't ready for this. Sleeping Beauty wasn't a huge help either....SHOCKER! I finally got a call back from the dr who said to head to the hospital.

Approximately 3 am, we finally left for the hospital. Sleeping Beauty didn't have a license, so I had to drive the car to the hospital, while in labor. Once there, they brought me into the triage room where they checked to see if it truly was my water. While they examined me, they found that I was 4 cm dialated and 100% efaced (or however you spell it). All we had to do was wait for me to dialate more. They couldn't determine if my water did break, but figured that is what it was. They put me into my room, where I decided not to get an epidural because I wanted to walk around and it really wasn't too bad. I was able to walk around the maternity area, stopping periodically thru contractions. I sat on the laboring ball to relieve some of the pressure off of me and did whatever else I could. Finally around 8 cms I decided I needed an epidural because it was getting too much. By the time they came in, it was getting to the sorry too late period, they gave me a small dose. I was still able to feel the contractions and my legs, it was PERFECT! I was finally at 10cm and ready to push. Everyone was to leave the room except for Sleeping Beauty, the nurse, doctor and myself. After 45 minutes of pushing, my beautiful precious little boy was out and laying on my stomach. My first thought, which I said outloud, was he is so tiny. He was beautiful, absolutley amazing and precious.

Camdon Anthony was born on May 9, 2006 @ 2:22pm, weighing in at 5lbs 6 oz and 19 3/4 inches long. He was 4 weeks to the day early but healthy. I was up walking around 45 minutes after I gave birth, even though the nurses kept telling me not to. I figured I might as well get up and moving so I can recover quicker.

My stay at the hospital was good, except for being left there (which is for another day). I kept Camdon with me all day long. I fed him, changed him, held him, napped with him, and took care of myself. If I needed some water, ice, crackers, popsicles, etc I would just put Camdon in his "bed" and push him with me to get it. I never called the nurses, which they didn't understand, because I knew it was going to be only me taking care of Camdon when I got home so why not start when I was in the hospital. The only time I brought Camdon back to the nursery was when I went to bed at night, but as soon as I woke up the morning I was there to pick him up.

I was in the hospital for 3 days (including the day I gave birth). On Thursday, my sister in law came down and brought Camdon and I home from the hospital. One of her neighbors drove her the 1 hour down so that she could drive my car and my brother drove down later to pick her up. What would I have done if Jules wasn't around? Would they have let me leave the hospital on my own? Would I be stuck there? Camdon was 4lbs 13oz upon discharge, even scarier than when he was born.

On friday I was to take Camdon in and get some blood drawn to check his levels due to his jaundice. We were to go to the dr that afternoon to find the results. It was that afternoon that I had to do one of the hardest things a new mom could do.....I had to bring my newborn son back to the hospital to be readmitted into the NICU. His bellirubin levels were at the max for a newborn and he needed to be put under a strong light to get the jaundice fixed. I wasn't able to stay at the hospital since they had no rooms available for me, but I also wouldn't be able to be with my baby if I was in the hospital since he would be under blue lights his whole time. I would go back and forth to the hospital numerous times a day to visit with Camdon. I was able to take him out from under the light when I was nursing him, but he had to go back under as soon as we were finished.

3 days later, Mother's Day of 2006, and I got the call that my son was being discharged from the hospital. I felt like the luckiest mother in the world and couldn't get to the hospital quick enough. From this day forward we have never had to go back for anymore jaundice related issues and I am much appreciative for that.

1095 Days/26280 Hours/1576800 Minutes

I can't believe my child has been on this earth for 1095 Days, 26280 hours, 1576800 minutes....not too bad for someone who was 4 weeks early to the day weighing in at 5lbs 6 oz and 4lbs 13 oz when discharged. Not bad for someone who had to sit in the NICU for 3 days after being discharged one day and readmitted the next. My child is a blessing, a true blessing and sometimes I ask what I did to deserve such a great gift.

I have been following so many blogs of parents who are either pregnant and aware that their child is going to be born with a terminal, sometimes fatal disease or who have lost their children either inutero or at birth. Here I am a single mother of an amazing child who had a few issues at birth but has overcome them all. If you weren't aware of Camdon's "prebirth" life you wouldn't think he was any different than any other child. My whole pregnancy, from my ultrasound at 18 weeks, was followed by many doctors appts and multiple ultrasounds to monitor him. At 18 weeks, my healthy child was showing signs of a calcification, which to the doctors is signs of cystic fibrosis. Being a single pregnant woman having to deal with this, amongst all the other things going on in my life, was a challenge. I was scared that my child was going to require more then I would be able to give him. I was petrified that my child was going to be terminally sick for however long he lived. I was mortified that my child had a very good chance of dying long before I did.

3 years later, I am responsible for a healthy and clear toddler. I am the mother of a highly active, entertaining, free spirited boy. I am grateful for what I was given and I wouldn't change him for the world. I think back than I was scared that I wouldn't have the strength or power to take care of a child with "needs"....BUT now I know I could do it. I have taken care of this little boy for 3 years all on my own and I have grown from this. I can manage more now then I ever thought I could 3 years ago.

Today was Camdon's birthday and man was it a great day. The rain kept trying to come but it held off until after the party ended and we were inside snuggling before bed. This was the 1st official birthday that Camdon really had fun at. I mean his 1st and 2nd bday were fun, but this was the first one that he got into and enjoyed with his friends. It was great to see the 4 toddler friends running around playing together and helping as he opened up his gifts. What a great day and how very blessed I am to have had this with Camdon. How blessed Camdon and I both are for having such a great family (J, J, C and D you rock) and friends to share this day with us. I have another little perk for the day, but I will keep that to myself....but I am sure some can guess what it is.