Wednesday's Walk

Since I posted a Wednesday's Walk last week by showing pictures of Camdon's first year, I figured I would go back a little bit further and talk about the day I found out I was pregnant....Oh what a day that was.
I just wasn't feeling very well, tired all the time and just not myself. I will admit at this point in my life, I was living a lifestyle completely different then what I am use to. I was out partying every night. When I say every night I mean get out of work by 5, go home change (sometimes I would just go out in what I wore to work), grab Sleeping Beauty (if he didn't take my car and pick me up already), and hit the first bar of many. We would usually start at a restaurant so we could get some dinner and a few drinks and then move on from there to either the billiards or back home to drink or to another bar or where ever. So when I was tired all the time and my stomach was upset in the morning, I just figured I was hungover and it would go away before the work day ended (which it did so I thought nothing of it). Well as time passed, Aunt Flow never came to visit for the week. I figured it was stress, because being in a relationship with Sleeping Beauty was stressful to say the least, and figured it would come the next day. The next day came and it went. The next day came AND it went. The next day came AND IT went. I went to the store and bought a test, figured just to ease my mind I might as well take a test to see it come out negative.
The next morning when I got up, I took the box in the bathroom opened it up and pee'd on the stick. I jumped in the shower while it was "thinking" and when I got out, there was only 1 line on the stick.....YES it is negative, PHEW!!! So I just went on with my day and you guessed it....MY NIGHT came and we were out partying. I mean I was allowed to party it up since the test came back negative...I had no worries, right? Aunt Flow is going to be here any day now...I just know it. Damn aunt flow didn't show up the next day, and she sure as heck didn't call to say she would be running late either. I just kept on waiting for her, since she was usually on schedule except for a few months. So I went to the pharmacy up the street from my house and purchased 2 more tests.
The next morning I got up, took the box in the bathroom opened it up and pee"d on the stick. Very groundhog day, huh? So you guessed it, I jumped in the shower while it was "thinking" and when I got out the stick had......1 line on it. Okay so 2 tests are now negative so I am definitely not pregnant.....Right? I continued living my life as it was. If I wasn't partying with Sleeping Beauty I was fighting with him and going crazy.

3 weeks later and Aunt Flow hasn't called or written to say she was not showing up this month. I took yet another test....it came back YET AGAIN NEGATIVE! What the heck is going on with me? Am I really that stressed out that I am throwing everything out of the loop? Well my yearly physical was coincidentally during the 3rd week. I went to the appointment and when asked when my last period was, I had to reply with "Well Cindy that is the problem, I haven't gotten 1 in a long time". Now Cindy, the nurse, is so amazing and easy to talk to. She had me go into the bathroom and pee in a cup, she then went behind the wall and came back out within seconds. She was the one that had to announce to me that my life was going to change in every possible way I knew it to be. Cindy is the one that had to tell me that I was "indeed" pregnant.

OMG! What am I going to do? How am I going to tell everyone? What am I going to tell everyone? How am I going to do this? Can I do this? I am not ready for this? OMG! OMG! OMG! They put me in a room so I could talk to the doctor since I wasn't going to be having my yearly physical anymore. The doctor came in and went over the different options I had. Options? I have options?

Talking to her and answering some questions they were able to tell me that my due date would be 6/6/06 and I was 10 weeks pregnant. Now I have to tell you that finding out at 10 weeks, you really have a very short window of time to make any decisions to your future. You are given 2 weeks to decide in which way you are moving with this. If you are to keep this child there is really nothing to think about except making the appointments. If you are to "terminate" this you need to make this very serious decision in less than a 2 week period of time. Adoption.....that is another choice and is in the very short period of time as well.

Leaving the office I was stunned. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know where to go. Life was a blur to me and I couldn't get out of it. I couldn't' get out of my own way at this point.

I called Sleeping Beauty, who was aware of my 3 attempts to find this out on my own, to find out where he was. He was being such a A$$H@!E, excuse my language. He wouldn't tell me where he was, what time he was coming home, NOTHING. I had to tell him while I was on the phone that I was indeed pregnant and would be at his place when he got out of work. When he arrived home it felt like an ice storm just came thru on a warm fall day....IT WAS COLD! We talked about it. We talked about where we were headed as a couple, we talked about our futures. He opted to tell me he wanted me to terminate this and that was where he stood. I couldn't do that. I have always believed that if I laid in the bed I need to deal with the "consequences". I got myself in this situation and I now need to grow up. I debated and debated and debated. I even made an appt to terminate. I couldn't go thru with it and made the decision (which is what I had said all along) that I was going to have a baby and be a momma.

Okay that is it for now......I have only 1 more thing to say:

I would never go back and change my decision. I never regret the choice I made. I may not have it easy, I may not have the "perfect family", I may not be where I should be in life....BUT I do have the most amazing son I could have ever asked for. I have a true blessing in my life who has taught me more in his 3 years of being on this earth than I learned in my 27 years without him in my life.

I love my son and nothing will ever change that!!!

ABC's of Me

ABC's Of Me

A - Age: 30 years young

B - Bed size: Queen
C - Chore you hate: Hmmmm, not really a chore I hate. I just don't like when they all build up, makes it tough to fell like it is being conquered....that's what I hate about chores.
D - Dog's name: No dog at this house
E - Essential start your day item: Shower and snuggle time with little man
F - Favorite color: Pink (bright pink's)
G - Gold or Silver: Platinum
H - Height: 5'7 1/2"
I - Instruments you play: Ummmmm Camdon's saxophone whistle (does that count?)
J - Job title: Slave, AKA Office Manager and Full time single mom
K - Kid(s): 1 Handsome little boy, Camdon.
L - Living arrangements: Currently living back at my mom's with Camdon
M- Mom's name: Karen
N - Nicknames: Mama, Mandy, Manda, AJ, Demanda
O - Overnight hospital stay: A few weeks after I was born I ended up getting pneumonia and dying 3 times so I was in the hospital for that. I was also in the hospital when I gave birth to my son.
P - Pet Peeve: Lying, cheating, laziness
Q - Quote from a movie: "Get busy livin' or get busy dyin'" (The Shawshank Redemption)
R - Right or left handed: Right Handed
S - Siblings: 1 brother, 1 sister and 1 half sister
T - Time you wake up: Lately it has been 5:30 AM with Camdon
U - Underwear: What about them? I wear them...do you?
V - Vegetable you dislike: Is a tomato a vegetable? I don't totally hate them though, I can eat them in salsa and what not, but I just can't swallow them whole they gross me out.
W - Ways/Reasons you run late: Camdon slept in, couldn't get motivated, Camdon didn't want to cooperate, Traffic
X - X-rays you've had: Knee's, ankles, fingers, arms...do ultrasounds count as xrays?
Y - Yummy food you make: Homemade Mac-n-cheese....SCRUMPTIOUS!
Z - Zoo animals you like: Elephants, Giraffes, Monkeys, Bears, Lions

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to http://www.mycharmingkids.net" to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Yesterday, I most certainly did not laugh hysterically at my child when he feel at the beach running from a tiny wave, sliding into the "mud". I would also never run from my child who needed a hug after getting up from said muddy sand so that I wouldn't become dirty either. NOPE never would I do that.

Also, I didn't let my child run to the neighbors tree last night in just a Pull Up and shirt, so he could put a band aid on the "boo boo" tree. That would just be plan silly, now wouldn't it?

I am not that mother that drives thru a fast food place to get her son dinner because she just didn't feel like cooking. Oh no, I would have made a homecooked meal after working 9+ hours.

Oh and I am not that mother that says "if you don't eat all your dinner you can't have dessert" and then goes and gives him dessert at a BBQ. I always stick to my guns and let my child learn his lesson no matter where we are, I just wouldn't give in.

While I am not fessing up to any of these things, I guess I can add that I would never brib my child to poop on the potty. I would never buy him something at a store and then tell him that he can only have it if he poops on the potty. I just would never do that....NOT ME!

Here's to a better week!

Funny Boy...

Oh My Gosh! Camdon was on a roll of funny things tonight and I had to type them up so I never forgot them.

First he apparently decided that since the sun hasn't come out lately it must be winter, because he put on the winter hat we use for dress up/snow people building in the winter.

He was then playing with a cardboard box. I asked what he was going to put it in the box and he told me he was going to put "stuff in there". So he went a grabbed a book and placed it in there. Camdon then proceeded to walk over to the side door, stopped and this is the conversation we had:

Camdon: I am going to put this in the garage.

Me: You are going to put that in the garage?

Camdon: Yup

Me: Buddy, we don't have a garage.

Camdon: Why?

Really, what am I suppose to say to that? Where does he come up with these things? He makes me laugh.

This was the most recent thing this evening that he did to make me just shake my head and laugh.

During one of the nasty ice storms we had this past winter, a huge section of the tree in the neighbors yard split off.

Ever since the tree split Camdon has been telling us that the tree has a "boo boo". Today he was looking out the back window and told us, grandma and I, that the tree "has a boo boo and needs a bandaid". I responded with "that is going to be one big bandaid, not sure they sell them that big buddy".

After Grandma got back from doing her errands, she told Camdon she had something for him....it was a box of Winnie the Pooh and Friends bandaids. Camdon's first comment was that the tree needed a bandaid......UHHHHHH sorry budy but the tree isn't ours and Mr Ed (the neighbor who is a mean neighbor) probably wouldn't like us in his yard. Well Camdon didn't let that stop him, he kept saying the tree needed a bandaid so Grandma went outside with him to the tree.

Putting the bandaid on the tree (yes he is pantless, but he had on a Pull Up)

The tree with it's new bandaid on, hopefully it helps heal it. :-)

Nice job buddy...good choice putting Tigger on the tree.

I love the creative mind Camdon has. I am proud of the love he has in his heart. I am delighted by the humor that he has, even though he isn't trying to be funny. He cracks me up and I wouldn't want it any other way.

Thanks buddy for being just you!

Sunday, Sancastles, Salt and Sprinkles

What do the 4 of them have in common?

That was how Camdon and I spent our Sunday morning at the Beach looking at the Sandcastle display, playing in the Salty water before it started to Sprinkle. We had such a good time checking out the Sandcastle display, then digging in the sand and playing in the Salty water.

Each year, Hampton Beach has an Annual Sandcastle Competition. This year it was the 9th Annual Hampton Beach Master Sand Sculpting Competition. The whole thing kicked off on June 13th and ran until today, June 28th. This evening they will be knocking down all the displays "of security and safety issues.....2o tons of sand can hurt if it were to fall on someone".

It is amazing what the artists can do with 10 tons of sand and 21 hours in 3 days. I wouldn't have the patience that these people have to have, the steady hand that is much needed to create these art pieces and the mindset to come up with the designs.
A GAME

Garden Delight

Dueling Grannies

Captain M...Arrrghk

Blossom (Camdon kept calling it a banana)

Whispering Oak

Rock Star

Platypus Tours

I can't wait for next years competition, which will be held June 11-24, 2010.

So after we were done checking out the masterpieces, we went down to the water and checked it out.Cheese!

We then decided we would go to the playground on the beach......


That was a birthday cake according to Camdon.



Now it was time to build our own masterpieces and play down at the water again....

Our Masterpieces!

He wanted me to dig him a hole to stand in.

Going to put his feet in.

We stand by each other all the time.
Running from the waves.....and right after this he tripped and slid on his belly.

I am truly a lucky mama to have such a great little guy. We have so much fun together no matter what we are doing. I love sharing this world with him and exploring things together. What a active morning we had....and all of the above happened within a 90 minute period.....PHEW!

Aloha Friday

Welcome to this week’s edition of Aloha Friday.

In Hawaii, Aloha Friday is the day that Hawaiians take it easy and look forward to the weekend. So I thought that on Fridays I would take it easy on posting, too.

Therefore, I’ll focus on what we have planned for the weekend and end by asking a simple question for you to answer. Nothing that requires a lengthy response.

This weekend, Camdon and I are pretty busy (which is how I like it lately).

Starting off today, I worked for a few hours this morning from home while Camdon played and watched a movie. We went outside shortly after that to get some fresh air before the rain decided to show again. Camdon went down for a late nap and I was hoping to go to the playground after he wakes up, but now that it is raining that is not happening....OH WELL! I am now thinking maybe we can go to the mall and he can play at the play place there or just go to a store to get him out of the house.....we shall see how he is when he gets up.


Tomorrow, Saturday June 27th:

I am thinking of hitting a few yard sales and possibly the estate sale down the street from the house (weather permitting). In the afternoon we have a BBQ to attend. My friend Kristen, was diagnosed with MS shortly after she had her first child (a little over 2 years ago) and her father was diagnosed about 9 years ago. This year we, Camdon and I, participated in the MS Walk to help raise money in hopes of eventually finding a cure for this debilitating disease. Every year Kristen and family host a BBQ at their house during the summer to say Thank You for walking, collecting money, supporting us. Unfortunately tomorrow is suppose to rain as well, so I don't know what is going to happen.


Sunday, June 28th:

Well we were suppose to attend a "Buttons & Bows" party, but it got cancelled. I really wanted to go to see what this company is all about and was super excited to see the deals you could get. Oh well maybe they will have a new date soon. So I think we are now going to head over to the beach and see the sand castle exhibit they have going on....this weekend is the last weekend, but with our luck it will be finished due to all the rain we have going on. Whatever we do it will be fun.

So now my question......What is your favorite way to pamper yourself?

I like to go and have a pedicure. I have had 1 massage in my life, right before I gave birth, and I LOVED that as well.

If you’d like to participate, just post your own question on your blog and leave your response below. Don’t forget to visit the other participants! It’s a great way to make new bloggy friends!

Wordless Wednesday/Wednesday's Walk